The end of a relationship, be it a marriage, de facto relationship or a couple dating, is the end not only of the actual relationship, but also the hopes, dreams and future that were woven into that relationship.
The loss is further compounded with property settlements, the loss of friends, child custody and companion pet custody decisions. Each episode reminds us of the intangible losses that are occurring.
No one understands my grief
Those around you may believe you should feel relief or happiness that you are free of a relationship that may have been violent, unloving, or unfaithful. Subsequently, your emotional pains at having to face the end of a relationship may be underestimated by those close to you.
There are also other emotions that yu have to deal with such as anger, frustration, possibily the desire for revenge.
You also have to figure out how to go forth in the world and survive as solo entities whilst still dealing with many of the issues that bind you to the former relationship. You want to break free from the relationship but are tethered to its memories because of the practicalities involved in your daily lives.
No formalities, no rituals
Those who experience divorce are not treated as a widow or widower would be treated. There are no formally recognised rituals to help a person move forward or draw a line under that part of their life. Nor are there phrases or words of condolence that people can offer. The divorced person floats around in a strange space that those around them often don’t know how to handle.
Coping in the here and now whilst knowing there is a future ahead to rebuild is another challenge that you have to face.
If you would like assistance to help move through this phase of your life please call 0401441266.